The Struggle is Real

Okay, I know there are harder things to do in life, but for me this dietary shift has proven more difficult than I'd like to admit. I read up on prepping for the Whole 30, and like most diets I was reminded that meal prep would be the key to my success. So, after making my shopping list I headed to the grocery store. To be honest I have put off buying many things organic because I was sure my grocery bill would go through the roof. Truth be told, by eliminating the crap food that I would usually buy for convienience sake and replacing it with healthier foods (many of which were organic) my bill was only about $40 more than average! That's not all that bad considering it is the fuel that is running my body. This is how I need to start looking at it. Food is great, it is fun, it is/can be indulgent. That does not mean it needs to be shit. Anyway, I prepped my heart out. I bought fruit for grab and go snacks (apples, grapefruit, grapes etc). I peeled and cut up carrots to crunch on and I hardboiled eggs. I baked plenty of chicken with various seasonings to use in salads and par-boiled diced sweet potatoes...I was good to go! 

Preparing food was not as difficult as I thought it would be. I did it all in one day for the remainder of the week, and I made my lunches up for work the night before. What I didn't expect to be as difficult was avoiding the indulgences that I would now have to steer clear from. It sounds silly really, but when I see a piece of chocolate I'm like a shark in a pool of blood. 

Feel free to fast forward to the 30 second mark. This is seriously how I felt! Hold me back!!!

In the past, if I wanted it I'd just eat it. Then in dawned on me...other than health that is one of the best things I can take away from this 30 day journey. Self control is a wonderful thing to posses and I needed to practice some in terms of my food intake/choices. I found myself pausing in front of the bowl of leftover Christmas candy while visiting with my aunt, thinking "one won't hurt", but I held strong and forced myself to walk away (those festive holiday wrappers were taunting me). So yes, learning self control is something I will definitely take away from this.

So, the past few days have had some not so glorious moments. I had tear myself away from wanting sweets, I couldn't have a delicious everything bagel smothered in cream cheese that I really wanted for breakfast, and I realized I HATE coconut milk. I bought it for my coffee, but ended up dumping the whole cup down the drain after trying it. I didn't have time the next two days to get out to buy Almond milk to give that a go, so I went without coffee, which led to quite the headache and caffeine withdrawal (which go ahead and google is a real  thing). I was in bed earlier than normal to deal with the lack of "energy", and then lucky me, I came down with some sort of flu like symptoms (unrelated) and ended up couch bound for an entire day, where the only things I ate in a 24 hour period was an orange and an avocado. I did however get an epic mid day nap and some TV series marathons under my belt. 

I had several people say to me today "but you are tiny, you don't need to do this". It is not about size, nor am I tiny (in stature perhaps, I stand all of 5'2"). You can make unhealthy choices and not be overweight, but that does not mean you are in optimal health. You can be making healthy choices and be overweight as well. There are a lot of factors that go into the physicality of it all. I want to be a healthier version of myself for my family (and myself of course) and that is all that matters. The struggle is real, but worth it.